There’s nothing like watching your husband crouching in front of a breast cancer tribute wall as he pins his tribute…a tribute to his wife.
Yup, as I watched and snapped pics tears leaked from my eyes and my thoughts raced away with me. My chest hurt as I pictured that he could be doing that without me here. Of course ‘I am here’ because cancer is not taking me.
Mother’s Day for me isn’t about celebrating my mother, instead it’s about my husband and my own boys and these days it’s about breast cancer. Sure, I did the treatment and fingers crossed cancer will stay away but breast cancer will always be a part of our lives. Always.
I take medication daily that has its own side effects, I’m in an oncology ward once a month for a needle, I’m covered in scars, live with pain and restrictions and no matter how ‘positive’ I am I’m very aware of my percentages. On the flip side I’m here…I draw breath, can cuddle my kids, lay beside my mister every night and plan to keep doing all of these things.
One look around a Mothers Day Classic and you will see plenty of tribute cards with heartfelt and painful messages about women no longer here. Women who won’t see grandkids, graduations, weddings, promotions, birthdays…they won’t see anything because cancer cut their life short.
You will also see women walking with a limp, a bald head, lopsided chests and surrounded by support crews. They aren’t always easy to pick but because that was me, I can pick them every single time.
Then there’s women like me…the survivors or as I like to say ‘thrivers’. The ones who are full of life, proud, grateful and the ones who have leaky eyes because they know how freakin close they came to death…they know that life can change in an instant.
Every year now I walk with my mister and my dear friend Ann and her hubby. In Brisbane my dear cousin Ness runs and when she texts through her pics my heart is so full of joy and pride it feels like it might actually break.
Even though it was windy and wet I didn’t care, how could I care? Sheesh, I am sooo lucky to be standing in that wind and rain, right?! I saw kids the same age as my own boys who had no mother and felt like I wanted to hug them (I didn’t because…creepy).
I saw a husband pin his tribute card to the wall flanked by 2 little girls in tutus with wet ponytails…his tribute was for his wife who was no longer here. Far out, it gets me in the heart.
Of course when cancer is part of your life it affects every day not just ‘Mothers Day’, but how wonderful that all over Australia we have a day where we can come together united…giving strength and drawing strength. There’s lots of pink, medals, coffee, support groups, volunteers, exercise warm ups, choirs, merchandise and more.
Sure it’s sad but also extremely uplifting, which is why my Mister and I will do the walk every single year.
Oh, and this is the rainbow that appeared as we arrived…all the lovely women looking down from above…smiling.
til next time,
Learn more about the Mothers Day Classic HERE