Every single day I receive messages from women and sometimes men dealing with cancer. Some have received the dreaded diagnosis themselves, sometimes it’s concerned friends and family looking for answers and then there’s those who went through treatment years (sometimes decades) ago wanting to connect. Recently a reader asked me “what can I wear after a mastectomy?’ GREAT QUESTION!
Fifteen thousand Aussie women will receive a breast diagnosis this year, some will have no breast surgery, some will require major breast surgery and some will also have even more medical treatments like radiotherapy and chemotherapy. With treatments and surgeries their bodies and self esteem will take a battering.
Having a breast removed is painful, sometimes mentally but always physically. Different surgeons use different techniques, some mastectomies are more radical than others and everyone recovers differently but trust me, there’s pain and limb restriction involved.
Then there’s ‘multiple surgeries’, not all women have them, I did and recovery was slow while pain was a constant. After my first mastectomy I had another surgery just two weeks later to remove all my lymph nodes. Then in the following weeks another two more surgeries.
Having multiple surgeries in a short amount of time put extra stress on my body and slowed my healing and as I sit here writing this nearly three years later I’m still in daily pain. Yep, cancer is the gift that keeps giving! I can keep everything under control with regular yoga, massage, physio and diet but in those early post mastectomy months raging pain…raged.
Losing a breast or two also impacts on how a woman might dress, some women really want to hide all evidence of their missing breast…and cancer. There’s some who don’t care and don’t change a single thing about how they face the world.
There’s no right or wrong. I proudly wore my uni boob and didn’t give a flying fuck who noticed, except that one time a pack of ignorant teenage girls stared and pointed and commented loud enough for me to hear. That time, I cried.
When women lose a breast they lose much more than soft warm tissue and flesh, some lose confidence, self esteem and femininity. Suddenly their clothes don’t fit the same, their pain makes it difficult to dress and then if they have chemo it strips them of their hair, lashes and brows…yeah, good one cancer!
Adrift Winter Georgie Dress in Khaki (2XL-4XL), Taking Shape Luna Basic Instinct Slip Dress (XXS-XL), Greta Poncho in Grey Stripe (One Size)
Practical Dressing Tips
Here you will find just a few easy practical tips, whether you choose to cover up or be more open there’s tips for you all. Knowing how to dress for comfort and practicality post surgery and camouflage a missing breast or two is tricky, but it’s something I became very good at.
- Post surgery you will need tops or dresses that have plenty of room in the arms, or try sleeveless, this will allow for drains and give freedom of movement. Sometimes you might have one or two drains (annoying and tricky to manoeuvre), after one of my surgeries I had eight!!
- Tight armholes are constrictive and in the few months to follow breast surgery comfort and ‘loose’ is what will serve you well. Try loose kaftan style tops.
- Look for tops with wide necks that will be easy to pull off/put on one handed. One limb might be heavily restricted and doctors orders will be to not raise your arms up over your head, so something you can ‘pull off’ over your head will be handy.
- Flowy tunics or kaftan style tops are perfect in summer, loose clothing is not only soothing and comfortable but makes it difficult to detect a missing breast.
Bohemian Traders Boyfriend Shirt Dress (XXS-4XL), Adrift Julia Kaftan (2XL-3XL), Taking Shape Geo Flock Jacket (12-24)
- In winter Jersey or bamboo is soft and easy to manoeuvre, it will cling more so creative dressing will be needed. During the summer months you might like a fabric with SPF protective technology to protect your scars.
- Vests or jackets might be handy for giving a little extra coverage over your chest area…like a security blanket. Jumpers, especially knits draw attention, so in the cooler months layer.
- All over print is a great way to cover up a missing breast.
- Be careful of details like pin tucking, smocking, pockets and ruffles near the chest. These may draw unwanted attention.
- Front opening buttons or press studs can be handy when getting dressed and for medical checkups.
- A layering tank under a tunic (once all healed) gives a little support and smooths any post surgery bumps.
- A scarf is the easiest way to to cover up your chest area and add a little colour lift.
- Be careful when wearing necklaces, watch where they end as they may draw unwanted attention.
Blue Bungalow Red Drape Top (One Size), Bohemian Traders Desert Rose Waterfall Jacket (XXS-4XL), Blue Bungalow Grey Kensington Fringed Scarf
- Wearing rock star accessories, shoes and jewellery which will draw the attention away from your chest.
- Once you start wearing a post operative or mastectomy bra a tank with wider straps will cover the wider bra straps.
- Mastectomy bras sit higher on the chest (to be able to hold the prosthesis), you may need to wear tops and tees with higher necklines or add a cami/tank under your tops.
Breast cancer sux…who am I kidding?…ALL cancer sux. I hope these tips help those women facing breast surgeries or currently struggling with post operative issues.
If the general public were more aware of what a women is ‘really’ losing as she fights for her life and became more accepting and less judgemental when it came to body image it would go a long way to how women feel about themselves during this extremely difficult and frightening time.
Til next time,
Jen x
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Great tips! Surgery sucks balls so anything you can do to feel better or make life easier post-op is a bonus! And yes, the front fastener is a great tip for medical appointments, and I found post operatively too.
Surgery does suck Sammie, the silver lining is we are both still here x
Great tips Jenni,I think the more comfortable and nice you feel can help,a little bit! I am sorry you’re still in pain,pain is draining on the body,I’d love to punch those teenage girls for being so nasty I wish people taught their children manners Xx
You’re so right Lis, when we feel comfortable and confident it goes a long way to helping us to heal x
Fantastic blog Jenni:) for those who’ve had the double M, button up, sleeveless are the only way to go. How the hell did you manage 8 drains???? Two were horrible to manage and painful especially when the skin started to grow over….ughhhhh. Interesting that you still have pain….I’m wondering when mine is going to end, so in a weird way it’s comforting to know that I’m not alone. My surgery was in October , 2014….then spacers out and implants in, in June. I wish I knew about your fb pages back then. You are so brave , and no doubt are doing a lot of good in the fb world….and the real world. You go girl??
Hi Angela, when I had 8 drains I had to carry 4 on each side in pillowcases!! My doctors say I’ll the pain forever, it’s just about managing it now with diet and exercise…and scar revision massage.
Hope your surgeries went well xx
i’ll say it again! you are one amazing woman jen! … inspirational!
good on you for helping people in a very worthwhile way!
sorry you are still in pain! … lots of love m:)X
Thanks M, life is good and I’m so lucky xx
Wath a wonderful tips Jenni, thanks, I’m already staring with this after 13 days from my cirgury, but wath about how high can be my heels even if I’m comfortable this 2 inches high ???