Doesn’t it just make all the difference when you can have a laugh with your medical team? I’m telling you…it sure does! Today I met up with my oncologist Kevin and his off sider Kristen, my mister came along and we got down to the business of life after chemo.
It’s now ticked over two years since I finished chemo, I know right…so grateful for two years! Sure two years has passed but I’m still on the merry go round and still back in an oncology ward once a month. Chemo is the gift that keeps on giving…management of side effects and planning for my future (love that word) are what we chat about at appointments with my oncologist.
When I finished chemo I was going back to my oncologist monthly for a few months there while we waded through medication options and more testing. Then I graduated to three monthly appointments and now I’m at six monthly appointments. Today I was hoping he might say I’d graduated to yearly but he didn’t…I’m not taking it as a bad sign though, I reckon he just loves the laughs we have.
As you know I’m a very open book and I will talk about anything, nothing is off topic. It’s not just the Styling Curvy community who likes this but my doctors all like it too. It’s how they learn, from talking to women like me…delving deeper and hearing what ‘really’ goes on. It’s a two way street this doctor/patient thing and trust is the most powerful key to a healthy relationship.
Today Kevin was pretty happy with everything. Sure my teeth have more cavities and the thatch of hormonal hair on my chin is growing at an alarming rate and I have a few issues with joints and bones but on a scale of 1-10 I’m doing very well Thankyou…I like to think I’m an 8 🙂
This morning we went over my medication, some surgery options for down the track and sex! Hold up, sex talks in an oncologists office, I didn’t see that talk coming?! Uhuh, you read that right. The good docs are now realizing that stripping a woman of her breasts and her libido through treatment and surgeries isn’t such a fabulous way to live life and they are trying harder to understand the impacts on relationships and individuals.
I’ve written about sex after cancer before and in all seriousness it is an issue and one that at just forty fear years of age I want sorted. So we chatted about lubes, compound chemists, Viagra for the vag ( it’s a thing!), sex therapist options and sex shops. OMG…sex shops! On my doctors orders the mister and I are going to do some ‘research’, I mean what else does a personal shopper do right? It’s my thing 🙂
Yup, we’re going to investigate some sex shops and try to get some ‘between the sheet’ action happening. I mean if the specialists can hold conferences and tour a sex shop then we can too. I suggested my doc could come with us but that would be creepy so we told him we were up for the job and would report back in six months when I see him again.
Can you believe it? If you’d have told me 2 years ago that after chemo I would find myself talking about sex with my oncologist I’d have laughed…which might have been nice because two years ago there was a bit of crying going on. This is the reality of cancer. It’s not all chemo, hospitals and bald heads. Treatment brings side effects and sometimes they are life altering and long lasting, thank goodness I have doctors I can have a good old ‘snort laugh’ with.
Today wasn’t what I expected but it was good news, a good day and I’m grateful to be living this blessed good life.
Got any tips for touring a sex shops? Is there an etiquette or code or something?
Fay says
July 9, 2015 at 5:22 pmAll I can suggest is try not to laugh and point at the same time! Oh and it’s best not to to say too loudly “OH MY GOD LOOK HOW BIG THAT THING IS!”
Jenni says
July 9, 2015 at 5:48 pmHaha!!! Great advice
SHaryn says
July 9, 2015 at 5:35 pmWell Jen, it’s not bad news……
So get shopping girl, do what you do best
And from a personal point of view take hubby & enjoy.
The shopping, the looking , the touching, and enjoy having a great big laugh at times.
It’s interesting !!!
Jenni says
July 9, 2015 at 5:49 pmAll good news and doing new things….can you believe it?!
Hazel says
July 9, 2015 at 5:41 pmJenni you are a card,I worked next door to a sex shop in Melbourne Street 30+years ago,and was horrified to have to deliver the owners lunch order,I kept my eyes down and raced in and out in quick time,the more mature me would stop and have a look see,how we change on this journey called life.
Jenni says
July 9, 2015 at 5:49 pmHaha!! It’s going to be an eye opener that’s for sure
Michelle says
July 9, 2015 at 5:58 pmDon’t you just love it when you can have that kind of relationship with doctors? I adore my renal specialist, although not so much after just having a kidney biopsy this week. And my rhuematologist is the bomb! Mind you, we don’t talk about sex and sex shops, but there has been some pretty frank discussions in their offices.
Oh and I now have Barry White singing in my head, ” let’s get it on….”
Jenni says
July 9, 2015 at 9:07 pmGood ole Barry…now it’s in my head LOL hope the biopsy results are favourable x
Bec says
July 9, 2015 at 6:11 pmI love reading your posts on post chemo life. My husband is having his fourth round of chemo this week and I can’t wait until we are into the next phase. Your posts give me insight and some laughs just when I need them. Thanks Jen xo.
Jenni says
July 9, 2015 at 9:09 pmBec I read your comment to my husband (hope you don’t mind)…we have both been where you and your man are and if we can make you smile and show you there’s life after treatment then that fills us with joy you will get through and it will make the next phase sweeter x
Shell Parsons says
July 9, 2015 at 7:47 pmHa ha Jen….another fabulous post! I remember being about 18 and out with three friends in the Cross one night. There were 2 males and 2 females. Anyway, one of the guys suggested we go and have a browse in a sex shop. He and my female friend just walked in, totally unabashed. The other guy and I sort of sidled in. I was convinced that when we walked back out, Mike Willesee would be there with the whole A Current Affair team doing a feature on the sex industry which my mum would see the next evening after the news. Trust me, as an innocent 18 year old that shop was one hell of an eye opener to a whole other world!!!!!
Jenni says
July 9, 2015 at 9:10 pmI’m pretty open and liberal but I’m a bit nervous
Rita diBartolomeo says
July 9, 2015 at 7:54 pmI’m so glad today went well for you! Hahaha just think of it as shopping right??? I can totally relate to the topic of sex after chemo, this year will be 7 years for me and it’s just starting to all come back!!! Have fun shopping xx
Jenni says
July 9, 2015 at 9:12 pmI’ll shop for anything LOL. 7 years…gosh just look at you though! You’ve come so far x
Lisa mckenzie says
July 9, 2015 at 8:22 pmGood luck with it Jenni let us know if you try the Viagra vag it sounds interesting!
Jenni says
July 9, 2015 at 9:12 pmIt blew my mind when he was telling me about it!
Esther says
July 10, 2015 at 12:34 amHilarious and good news.,a bit unsure about the upcoming selfies of you and your husband modelling your new wares though. Remember once seen these things are seen they can’t be unseen.LOL
Jenni says
July 10, 2015 at 5:18 amOh there will be none of that Esther…I can assure you 🙂
merilyn says
July 10, 2015 at 6:19 amyou are great how you are so open with your doctors jen!
as they can’t learn that side of things unless someone tells them about the reality of how you are
functioning as a woman! … one whose psyche and body has been through a huge amount of trauma!
you are their link and educator! … ofcourse every case would be different! … that they are actually listening is a start!
hope you find your mojo! I guess experimentation and fun on the journey and be open to new and helpful ideas!
a sensitive issue at any time!
much love m:)X
Sammie @ The Annoyed Thyroid says
July 12, 2015 at 3:53 amWell, now you get to do more shopping and get new “toys” – see there’s always a flip side! I agree, the only reason you can’t go for annual appointments is because Kev can’t wait 12 months to see you, especially now he wants his personal updates! Onwards and upwards! (No pun intended!)